Hey! Performance appraisal season is here again. And I’m sure almost every employee has gone through their performance appraisal by now, hoping that a fair review this year might translate into a better bonus next year. So, why not I tell a story about my friend, someone who has experienced an unfair performance appraisal.
The Employee Every Company Claims to Want
She, my friend, is what many employers would consider a dream hire. Self-taught, dependable, able to multitask, willing to be a team player, willing to learn, and always stepping up beyond her job scope. She also has initiative and the ability to work independently without constant supervision. Basically, the type of employee companies brag about having… until it’s time to reward them. LOL
Of course, being all that, she expected to receive strong ratings in her performance appraisal and maybe… just maybe… earn a promotion. After all, she handled responsibilities far above her pay grade, including tasks that her superior was supposed to do. HAHAHA.
So, she went for her performance appraisal session. Although she was gaslighted several times and subtly made to feel incompetent, she persevered. She justified her work calmly and professionally. She already sensed she wouldn’t get the promotion, but okaylah, at least the appraiser ended the session by giving her ratings that felt fair and aligned with the discussion.
The Revision Nobody Told Her About
To cut a long story short: when it was time for her to sign the form, she noticed something strange. Her ratings were lowered. Quietly. Without explanation. She was suddenly at the borderline of “Average.” Funny thing? Nobody informed her of the revision. If she hadn’t read it properly, she would have signed blindly. Gila.
Others advised her to raise the issue. So she did. She prepared a detailed justification document: listing her tasks, achievements, impact, and the extra contributions, with the hope that whoever requested the downgrade would see her worth clearly in writing. Konon.
But instead of conducting a proper reappraisal, her appraiser simply called her over the phone. No structured explanation. The appraiser didn’t walk her through why they suddenly rated each factor lower. Just mumbling things unrelated to the guideline, things that weren’t even part of the official assessment criteria. And yes… she was gaslighted again.
When she requested the appraiser to show her justification document to the people who allegedly asked for changes, the appraiser said, “No need.” Kesian kan?
Image by 8photo
Eventually, the ratings stayed. The appraiser insisted that since her score still fell under “Above Average,” adjusting the marks wasn’t necessary. But she couldn’t help thinking: “If it’s not an issue because I’m still in the Above Average category, then why couldn’t they just keep the original rating?” Well, the answer was obvious: they were trying to manipulate the narrative.
When Growth Is Blocked, Survival Mode Switches On
At that point, she knew she wouldn’t win. Her own superior, the person supposed to guide and support her growth, was the one blocking it. Between the gaslighting, the shifting explanations, and the refusal to be transparent, she realised no one inside the system would fight for her.
So she made a different decision. She stopped expecting growth and recognition. She stopped believing the “we value our people” speeches. Membongak. HAHAHA. She decided she would no longer work to build a future there…but only work to be paid. And honestly, can anyone blame her? When a performance appraisal becomes a tool to suppress instead of elevate, the only logical response is self-preservation.
She still shows up and does her job (maybe with slightly reduced enthusiasm. Siapa tak down, kan?). But the part of her that once wanted to grow under that so-called leadership? Gone. Quietly. And maybe permanently.
Anyway, if this ever happened to me, I honestly don’t know what I’d do. Probably blog about it… like a normal, emotionally stable adult… and then shamelessly plug my Ko-fi page while I’m at it. So if you enjoyed this emotional roller coaster, feel free to buy me a coffee (or kirim to my friend) at ko-fi.com/nlymr. HAHAHAHAHA.
Thanks for reading!